bad air

[[ This started while reading  Ryszard Kapuściński, The Shadow of the Sun, where he describes the anxiety that comes with malaria. And wordplay: malaria as 'bad air' and even 'bad song'. ]]

a feeling of anxiety

I know no reason

I believe a curse 

has come upon me

I believe a spirit 

has entered me

I am fixed to earth

light is unbearable

the sound and smell 

the touch of others

I am cold as death 

and trembling  

hold me down with

all your weight

gasoline and perfume

the peace of the past

is gasoline and perfume

burning off surfaces

me pulling the zipper up 

the back of her dress

and watching her fix sticky lips

this is the soil

I am rooted in

this is the air

I inhale

me peeling his boots 

from his feet after work 

and watching the earth fall away

this is the soil

I am rooted in

this is the air

I inhale

gasoline and perfume

burn away in the sun


[[ smells and sights of childhood ]]

lick your fingers

salt and vinegar

on fingertips

smell of hot oil

and sweat 

pools of light 

on the sidewalk

men smoke and steam

in between

women want a 

nowhere to go

lick your fingers